Sunday, April 12, 2009

Oh, Yes They Are

that stupid. As I did not do anything for April Fools’ Day, I am offering short bits on real fools.

1) North Texas Representative Betty Brown raised a stir when she suggested that Asian-Americans might change their difficult sounding names to make it easier on poll officials – and other Americans. Betty’s immortal words:

Rather than everyone here having to learn Chinese — I understand it’s a rather difficult language — do you think that it would behoove you and your citizens to adopt a name that we could deal with more readily here?

The first thing to note is that Betty was addressing the representative of the Organization of Chinese Americans, Ramey Ko. (There’s a tough one to pronounce.)

To make it worse - or better, depending on your sense of humor - Betty felt compelled to carry on:

Can’t you see that this is something that would make it a lot easier for you and the people who are poll workers if you could adopt a name just for identification purposes that’s easier for Americans to deal with?

Betty has ‘apologized,’ after several days of refusing to do so. Really, it was all just a misunderstanding. Presumably, someone has pointed out to Betty that Chinese Americans who vote are, in fact, here and citizens.

2) Brown’s being a Republican has garnered some predictable attention, so let’s turn to a Democratic legislator: Representative Kathi-Anne Reinstein of Massachusetts.

Kathi-Anne has proposed amendments to the state’s porn laws to include any photographs or video of ‘elders’ naked or engaged in lewd activity. ‘Elders,’ here, means anyone sixty years of age or older. Some of us better get those pics taken soon.

As Feminist Philosophers observes, The law is not limited to hardcore porn, nor is it restricted to commercial porn. Elderly lovers who take rude pictures of each other will be liable for prosecution.

Especially illuminating is that the amendments treat ‘elders’ and the mentally disabled in one fell swoop – as equally incapable of governing their own lives.

An additional fact of Kathi-Anne’s legislative service worthy of note is her promise to have the Flufflernutter declared the Official Sandwich of the Sate of Massachusetts.

Some bulbs never light.

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